Five Steps for Checking-In With Yourself
Between social media, unfettered access to alcohol, shopping, and carbs, there are many ways we can check-out and escape our woes. But every difficult feeling we suppress is just another metaphorical “can” that we’ve kicked down the road, another challenge we will have to meet head-on at one point or another.
If you are struggling with burnout, or things just seem to be more challenging than they used to be, consider checking-in instead of checking-out. Checking-in is a practice in mindfulness that can be done in 1-5 minutes (or longer if desired), at your desk, in the bathroom, in your parked car, or lying in bed.
Here are five steps to help you get the most out of your next mindful minute:
1. Give yourself permission to stop “doing” and start “being”
Mindfulness is not something you force yourself to do, but rather it is an act of compassion and curiosity about yourself. We spend nearly every waking minute doing one thing or another, usually because we tell ourselves “I have to” or “I should.” Let your mindfulness practice serve as a time to notice the “shoulds” without acting on them.
2. Breathe deeply and straighten your spine
Stress lives in your body. Deepen these precious moments with yourself by tuning in to your body. Breathe deeply and allow yourself to exhale slowly. Imagine your lungs expanding deep into your abdomen, allowing your belly to loosen and expand at the waist. Imagine a balloon pulling gently at the crown of your head, lengthening your spine and drawing a straight line between your ears, shoulders, and hips.
3. Practice noticing sensations in your body
As you tune into your body, notice how it feels. Allow yourself to notice physical sensations without getting caught up in describing them or figuring them out. This is your time to be, and the doing can come later.
4. Notice the thoughts you are having
The key here is to merely notice. We cannot clear your mind completely, we know you will have thoughts, but let that be it. If you notice yourself saying, “I’m thinking about my back pain” or whatever it might be, instead say to yourself “I’m having a thought about my back pain.” This subtle shift in language can help you notice the thought without committing to it.
5. Describe how you feel right now
Maybe you’re sad, happy, mad, or grateful. Or maybe you feel heavy and spinning. Or maybe your feelings at this moment escape words and can be most accurately described as a vision of color and texture. Whatever you are experiencing right now, don’t attempt to change it. Instead of seeking to change it, just be whatever you are in the exact place you are right now.
Checking-in can be brief and simple, and it can also be a lifelong practice. Often times we might have ideals about the perfect practice in the perfect place at the perfect time, and these ideals can get in our way! I encourage you to start your most imperfect and compassionate practice of being yourself. Right here. Right now.
Caleb Cheavens is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Career Consultant in Columbia, Missouri.